It's Sunday morning and I'm enjoying my Sumatra coffee. So delicious and necessary. It's a bright, beautiful day here in Chicago and I'm looking forward to what the day will bring. My daughter Sophia spent the night at her Dad's house Friday night and came home last night. After a little bit of drama she sat down at the end of the couch, brought her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on her folded hands and looked at me. The look on her face was a look that I have seen everyday for the last 8-1/2 years - love.
Growing up you have dreams of what your life will be like, what your children will look like and how it will really feel to be a parent. Watching my own parents I remember thinking, "I can't wait to have my own kids! That would be cool!" but it was always in reference to how cool it would be to be able to tell someone what to do and to just be "in charge" and have ownership of your life. Not that I wanted to be able to boss someone around (well, a little bit) but to be able to make the decisions. Also, I watched the interactions of my siblings (I'm the youngest of five - hence the need to boss instead of BE bossed lol) with my parents and with each other and always thought it was great. There was, and still is, so much love within our family and that's what I wanted when I got married and became a parent. To feel the love of a child and now that I have that, I can't imagine not having it.
Ok, so why am I writing about this? The purpose of this blog is to get me to re-figure my life path. To understand what I've done, where I went wrong, where I went right and to re-discover who I am and where I fit in in all of this. Looking over and seeing my beautiful little girl and the look on her face last night was the highlight of my day made me realize SHE is why I am doing this! Can't think of a better way or reason to start, can you?
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